Monday, October 4, 2010

back on the wagon

alright, so i have decided to only post when my ed is active. i am constantly caught between wanting to be so skinny i completely disappear and wanting to be rid of the voice in my head and just be normal.  unfortunately, i know the second option is lost to me forever so i might as well embrace it and get SKINNY!  so the absence was due to a slight upturn in my normalcy, but fear not, i am back with all the rest of you now, living our secret lives and loving the hell out of it. 

so today was a good day, the first of many i hope, but i have decided that a crucial step towards skinny is to fess up my weight.
it is 139.
i am 5'7".
there.
i said it.
i'm also going to keep track of junk of calorie counter for a bit and see how i like that. mostly, my big new plan is a game i play with myself. every time i successfully complete an objective (skip lunch w/o anyone noticing for example) i set aside a commensurate dollar amount to be spent at my discretion. I cannot spend money unless it is in that pot. i think this is a decent plan, i will def have to workout reasonable amounts for different things, though. could be a bit touch and go, though.

anywho, just hanging in here. hope all of you are well and staying strong!

-marie

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